The Word 6

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|Terry Pratchett - God? by Freak of NFA. Terry Pratchett has finally come into the limelight and is currently enjoying the very successful career that he has deserved for so long: his books are selling very well; second-hand prices are rising; there are model kits available of many of his Discworld characters; and he's taken a bold step into the Computer Games world with his CD-based game on the P.C. - Discworld. For those of you who have just returned from that once-in-a-lifetime trip to Pluto and back and have therefore never heard of the guy, or have heard of him but never read his work (eh? such people exist?), here's a quick guide to the stories, the characters in them, and the places that these characters inhabit... =================================================== |Where in the World? The Discworld is what it says, it's a large flat disc, with a Rim and a Hub as opposed to Poles, so you'd describe a geographical location as being "Rimward" or "Hubward" instead of Longtitudinal, and "Turnwise" instead of Latitudinal. The Disc has it's own sun, and is on the back of four giant elephants, which in turn are standing on the back of the Great A'Tuin, a giant, nay HEEEUUGGE bloody space turtle, which swims through space, obviously. Due to the orbit of the sun around the Disc, it is necessary for one of the elephants to cock a leg to allow it to pass every day. This does not happen anywhere else in the Universe. Once you've heard of a place on the Disc it's pretty difficult to forget it again as they all have their own peculiarities. The main city in the Discworld series is Ankh-Morpork, and is most noted for it's smell. The river Ankh does not flow so much as it Oozes, and you can't drown in it, in fact you can't even SINK in it. Ankh-Morpork is known as "The City that Never Sleeps", because the crime in the city doesn't take time out to go to bed. There is an even worse part of Ankh-Morpork called the Shades, where it is not advised to go at all, let alone in any party of less than three persons. Crime was eventually legalised so that the governing body (The Patrician) could at least excercise SOME control over it, in fact it worked rather well because the licensed criminals would take steps to get rid of anybody committing unlicensed crimes, and they are now only allowed a certain quota of Mugging, Burglary etc. Also in Ankh-Morpork is the Unseen University. This is basically the home of Magic on the Discworld, Wizards are trained here and the building itself is actually changing all the time due to the random leakages and concentrations of magic. Servant staff frequently quit the Unseen University because they are tired of waking up a different shape than they were when they went to bed. In the centre of the Disc, at the Hub, is Cori Celesti - Home of the Gods. Unfortunately the Gods don't really take too much notice of what's happening on the Disc, they're usually too busy quarrelling with the Ice Giants, who frequently "forget" to return the Lawnmower. At the edge of the Disc is Krull, this island has a large proportion of it's coastline actually hanging over the edge of the Disc. The only Krullians who did not appreciate this were those who did not look where they were going or who walked in their sleep. Natural selection ensured that there were not many of these. There is also a small island which has no name and only appears in "Small Gods" because one of the fishermen got caught up in events. It has just 51 inhabitants and exists in blissfull ignorance on the rest of the Disc, the only God is a very large Newt called P'tang P'tang who can't count, and as everyone is related to everyone else on a very close level indeed, they don't have a word for "War"... ...or "Metal", or "Fire" as it happens... =================================================== |Some Characters from the Discworld Like the places on the Disc, the characters who inhabit it are pretty hard to forget as well. Here are a few just to whet your appetite, more can be found in the books, obviously. Rincewind - A magician by definition only because he wears a pointy had and has a beard. He only manages the odd spell in life-or- death circumstances, and usually with outside (or indeed - inside) help. Luggage - Made from sapient pearwood, Luggage is basically a wooden chest with hundreds of little legs and admirable loyalty. It manages to convey an expansive array of expressions with a couple of knotty planks and a keyhole, bizarre! The Librarian - Head librarian at the Unseen University, has was accidently changed into an orangutan by a stray discharge of magic and has since refused to be changed back as the long arms, increased strength and head for heights seemed more suited to the job. Granny Weatherwax - Definately NOT the leader of the witches in the general area of the Ramtop Mountains (Because witches don't HAVE leaders you understand), with her chums Nanny Ogg and Magrat Garlick, save the Disc from marauding elves. Cohen the Barbarian - The greatest hero of all time on the disk, he's fought innumerable battles, but unfortunately is getting on a bit and has lost all his teeth. Death - An Anthropomorphic Personification who ushers the souls of the recently deceased into the next world, and who appreciates a good curry. Binky - Death's horse, he likes to eat hats. C.M.O.T. Dibbler (Mr.) - Cut-Me-Own-Throat Dibbler is one of the guys who always turns up to stiff the tourists out of a bob or three, he usually sells things on a stick, and is famed for selling things to the same people twice, even though they should have learned their lesson. =================================================== |Material to Look Out For... Starting with the most well-known stuff of all... |The Discworld The Colour of Magic - Where it all started, introducing Rincewind and Twoflower (and of course, Luggage), one of the great 8 spells that were used to create the world gets into Rincewinds' skull and doesn't want to leave. The Light Fantastic - Rincewind the "Wizard" is wander- ing around the Discworld as it's on a collision course with a star, and he's got one of the great spells in his head, very funny indeed, Luggage makes it's second appearance. Equal Rites - Nasty wizard-type-dude tries to pass on his staff to the eigth 8th son of an 8th son, a wizard. Unfortunately it's a girl... Mort - Outrageously funny, Death wants an apprentice, and he gets stuck with the hapless Mort. So blood funny that you have to take breaks from the mirth! Sourcery - The eight son of an eigth son has seven children, and the eigth is a sourcerer, Rincewind stars again. Wyrd Sisters - The King is dead, killed by an Evil duke, and it's up to Granny Weather- wax the Witch to get a rightful heir on the throne, very good. Pyramids - Err... Guards! Guards! - Um... Eric - A young whipper-snapper pretending to be a wizard inadvertedly rescues Rincewind from the Dungeon Dimensions, and so believes him to be a demon. Moving Pictures - Film comes to the Disc! Holy Wood is where they're made, the magic of the Silver Screen is working on the Disc, what will the Wizards say? Reaper Man - Ahh... Witches Abroad - Granny Weatherwax's sister is up to no good, making stories come true for her own purposes, and the three witches have to stop her. Small Gods - The Great God Om intends to visit the Disc as a great White Bull. The only problem is that he only has one believer left and so can only manage a tortoise, superb stuff! Lords and Ladies - Evil Elves are back on the Disc, it's the return of Granny Weatherwax and her companions as they struggle to save the Disc's inhabitants from the cursed charms of the Elven folk. |Miscellaneous Bits. Good Omens - Rediculous, funny parody of all (With Neil Gaimen) the "Omen" films, Judgement Day approaches and someone has mis- laid the Antichrist - The Best! Strata - Discovery of a Discworld in the future, by a woman who runs the Terraforming Company, not bad. The Dark Side of the Sun - Like Strata, it's more set in a future, not so funny. |Other Pratchett Truckers ~~~~~~~~ The Nomes in The Store are to be turfed out, first in the triology of what I thought was a rather good read, even if it IS aimed at younger readers. Diggers ~~~~~~~ Second in the Nome threesome, the Nomes have left the store and moved into The Quarry, but now humans are about and they have to move on again. Wings ~~~~~ Although it's the final part, it's actually set to run in parallel with Diggers, it's the story of what happened to the other Nomes while the rest were at the quarry. The Carpet People ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Very similar to the Nomes stories, but with less humour and more fantasy, this is actually the re-write of a book that T.P. did when he was 17! Only You can Save Mankind ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Johhny (a.k.a Rubber) plays the game on his pooter until all aliens surrender, which - according to the manual - is not what's meant to happen. Johnny and the Dead ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The Unadulterated Cat ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ |Graphic Novels The Colour of Magic ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The Light Fantastic ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Good artwork by Steven Ross and Joe Bennet, the story isn't quite the same so as to make allowances for the lack of depth of Graphic Novels. Mort ~~~~ Graham Higgins (Ex DC and 2000AD) does the honours this time around, the story is a little more adapted than T.L.F but it's still a giggle. The Streets of Ankh Morpork ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Not a Graphic Novel as such, it's actually a theoretical map of what Ankh Morpork should be like, developed by Stephen Briggs with the help of Mr.T. Pratchett. |Available on Tape The Colour of Magic The Light Fantastic Equal Rites Truckers Diggers Wings =================================================== |Overall Recommendation? If I were to thrust one particular book into your hands and proclaim it to be essential reading it would have to be "Good Omens" for it's out- right lunacy. The characters are wonderful, they fret and panic just like real people do, the scenes are weirdly set, there are wonderful little side-trips, and the whole book is deliciously funny, read it!